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June 03, 2009

Why Kate Clinton should be the car czar

From her current post at Bilerico:

"Well there's a job I never wanted," my mom once remarked as we watched an elephant trainer on some TV variety show putting a pachyderm through his paces. If I remember correctly, the gentle, possibly drugged, giant was in a top hat and tails doing "Putting on the Ritz." I said, "I'm glad you are narrowing down your career choices."

I never wanted to run a bankrupt car company either, but as a taxpayer apparently I now own one. Okay, here's what I want done by next Tuesday: change the name "General Motors" to something less militaristic. I like "I-Cars". As a matter of fact I'd like the Apple people to oversee the transition. Start with an I-Phone and then just add Applications like wheels, an electric motor, and a lightweight body. Even if they name it "I-Lemon" and the battery runs down after four hours, people will buy it if it's in cool packaging and they get a coupon for a free hour at the genius bar down at the virtual showroom....

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